Why New Year’s Resolutions Set You Up to Fail

Skip the resolutions this year and try news strategies instead.

Reviewed by Gary Drevitch

Key points

• Research shows that about 80% of people abandon their resolutions within the month. 
• Goals are more likely to succeed when they are specific and measurable.
• Successful people approach failure as feedback, not the end.

Every January, millions of people create New Year’s resolutions with the hope of transforming their lives: "This is the year I lose weight." "I’ll finally save more money." "I’ll learn to set healthier boundaries."

These intentions reflect our desire for self-improvement, but here’s the uncomfortable truth: Most of these resolutions won’t last until February. Research shows that about 80% of people abandon their resolutions within the month.

If you find yourself in this cycle year after year, you’re not alone. Resolutions often set us up to fail, not because we’re weak, but because the concept itself is flawed. Fortunately, there are alternative things you can do to set yourself up for success in the coming year.

Why Resolutions Fail

As a licensed therapist, I’ve seen countless clients set resolutions and then grow discouraged when they can’t keep them. If this sounds familiar, it’s not your fault. Here’s why most resolutions are doomed to fail.

1. They’re Based on All-or-Nothing Thinking. Most resolutions demand perfection. You might decide to go to the gym five days a week, eat no sugar, or meditate every morning. While these goals sound admirable, they leave no room for error. Miss one workout or indulge in dessert, and you feel like you’ve failed.

When we view our progress in binaries (success vs. failure), a single setback can derail an entire goal. This rigidity can quickly lead to burnout.

2. They’re Vague or Unrealistic. "I want to get healthier" is a common resolution, but what does that mean in practice? Without specific, actionable steps, it’s almost impossible to follow through. Unrealistic goals often backfire, leaving us feeling worse about ourselves.

Goals are more likely to succeed when they are specific and measurable. For example, "Go for a 20-minute walk three times a week" is far more achievable than "Get in shape."

3. They’re Rooted in External Pressure, Not Genuine Desire. Many resolutions are influenced by societal expectations or trends. Maybe you're trying to get a “beach body” because of popular beauty standards or taking up a new hobby because it’s big on social media.

When our goals come from external sources, we’re less intrinsically motivated to stick with them. Goals aligned with your core values are far more likely to succeed.

4. There’s a Lack of Structural Support. A resolution alone is not enough; it needs a system. For example, saying “I want to eat healthier” without a clear game plan–like stocking nutritious groceries and carving out time to cook–makes the goal difficult to achieve. Habits require structured cues and environmental changes if we want to make them automatic.

How to Rethink and Redesign Your Goals

Thankfully, there are better ways to approach goal-setting that don’t rely on an arbitrary date on the calendar. Instead of focusing on complete reinvention when the calendar flips, here’s how to rethink goal-setting so you can create sustainable, meaningful change.

1. Start Small, Think Big. Instead of swinging for the fences in January, focus on small, manageable actions. For example, if you want to exercise more, commit to just 10 minutes a day. Small wins build momentum and confidence, which make long-term consistency achievable.

2. Reframe Your Why. Take time to ask yourself why this goal matters to you. Are you choosing it because it's something you deeply value, or because you feel you should? Aligning your goals with intrinsic motivations creates a greater sense of purpose.

For instance, instead of focusing on "losing weight," you might reframe your resolution around "feeling stronger and having more energy so I can do fun activities with family.”

3. Use the SMART Goal Framework. A classic for a reason, SMART goals are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. For example, instead of saying, "I’ll save money," try, "I’ll save $50 a week by reducing my online purchases for the next 3 months."

4. Track Progress, Not Perfection. Perfection isn't the goal; progress is. Use tools like journaling or habit-tracking apps to celebrate your milestones, even the small ones. This focus on incremental progress taps into the brain’s reward system, increasing dopamine and making you more likely to stick with the habit.

5. Be Flexible and Kind to Yourself. Building a new habit or reaching a goal is rarely linear. If you hit a roadblock, that’s okay; it’s part of the process. The key is to give yourself permission to adapt instead of giving up. Hugely successful people approach failure as feedback, not the end.

For instance, if you miss a few days of exercise because you’re sick, adjust your goal rather than abandoning it entirely. It’s this adaptability that leads to longer-term success.

6. Create a Support System. Surrounding yourself with people who encourage your goals can make a significant difference. Whether it’s joining a fitness class, finding an accountability buddy, or simply sharing your progress with a trusted friend, human connection strengthens commitment.

Keep in mind, however, that support systems should empower—not shame—you into action. If a relationship feels toxic or disheartening, it’s okay to step back.

7. Have Fun. Goals are much easier to reach when we have fun along the way. If you hate running, don’t set out to run 5 miles a day. Choose cycling, swimming, or kickboxing to get moving instead.

Goals don’t have to be grueling or painful to be effective. Try something like the Joy Snapshot (a resolution alternative I recently discussed on the Mentally Stronger podcast) and you can still get results while having fun.

The Path to Real, Lasting Change

Instead of chasing perfection or trying to reinvent yourself in January, focus on building habits that resonate with your long-term values. Change doesn’t happen overnight; it’s the result of consistent, self-compassionate effort. Decide what truly matters to you, start small, and give yourself permission to learn and adjust along the way.

This year, ditch the hype and set yourself up for success, one intentional step at a time. You don’t need to wait until January to begin again. Every day is an opportunity to reshape your life with goals that honor who you are and where you want to go.