When Did We Start Adding to Bentching?

From the COLlive inbox: An apparently well-intentioned practice in girls’ schools raises an important question: Are we teaching them to follow the Alter Rebbe’s nusach, or are we creating a new one?

By M. Friedman

Recently, I heard my daughters bentching out loud at home, and something caught my attention.

At the end of bentching, they added the words “Sheyibaneh Beis Hamikdash bimheieo v’yomeinu…”

I was surprised. Those words aren’t in the Alter Rebbe’s nusach of bentching. When I looked into it, I discovered that this is apparently a practice being taught in girls’ schools in Crown Heights.

Now, there is obviously nothing wrong with wishing for the rebuilding of the Beis Hamikdash. Quite the opposite. It’s something every Yid should hope and daven for, but that wasn’t what bothered me.

What I found perplexing was, how do we take the liberty of adding to the nusach established by the Alter Rebbe?

In Chabad, we place tremendous importance on the precise wording of our tefillos. The Alter Rebbe’s Siddur is not simply another nussach of many, its wording and selections were carefully considered, and books have been written analyzing it.

In fact, there is a particularly relevant example in bentching itself.

Many other siddurim include the pesukim beginning “Na’ar hayisi gam zakanti” at the end of bentching. Yet the Alter Rebbe deliberately did not include them in his Siddur.

Rabbi Yosef Simcha Ginzburg discusses this distinction in Hiskashrus, issue 747, noting that the Alter Rebbe’s nusach concludes the final collection of pesukim with “Vehayah Hashem mivtacho,” omitting the additional verses commonly found in other siddurim.

If we are careful not to add pesukim that are found in other established nuschaos, how could we introduce an entirely new addition into our children’s bentching?

Wanting to make sure I wasn’t missing something, I submitted the question to AskTheRav, the halachic service overseen by Rabbi Yosef Braun, Mara D’Asra of Crown Heights.

The response was straightforward: “It should not be done on a regular basis.”

The answer specifically referenced the Alter Rebbe’s omission of “Na’ar hayisi” as an example of why we do not casually introduce additions into bentching.

There is another aspect of this that I find particularly puzzling.

My daughters, who are still young, do not yet recite the entire bentching. Yet somehow, this additional phrase has already become part of their routine.

The Alter Rebbe himself addresses the education of young children in bentching (Shulchan Aruch Harav, Orach Chaim 187:4). He explains that children under eight may be taught brochos gradually, with the goal of eventually reciting each one in its proper form.

Surely, our priority should be helping our children learn the actual words of bentching before introducing additional phrases that aren’t part of the nusach.

And let’s not forget that bentching already contains a beautiful, heartfelt request for the rebuilding of Yerushalayim and the Beis Hamikdash in the third bracha. We are not missing this essential theme.

I have no doubt that the teachers introducing this practice have the best intentions. I am sure that they want to strengthen the girls’ connection to Moshiach and the Beis Hamikdash and that is a wonderful goal. But that does not automatically justify changing the nussach.

I hope our schools will reconsider this practice. There are countless opportunities throughout the school day to inspire children with a longing for the Geulah without making additions to the nusach of bentching.

Sources:

• Shulchan Aruch Harav, Orach Chaim 187:4 — The established wording of bentching and the gradual education of young children.
• Hiskashrus, Issue 747 — Rabbi Yosef Simcha Ginzburg — Discussion of the omission of “Na’ar hayisi” from the Alter Rebbe’s Siddur.
• AskTheRav, Shailah #56420 — Personal correspondence regarding the addition of “Sheyibaneh Beis Hamikdash” to bentching. The response also references Igros Kodesh, volume 18, page 430, and Siddur Rabbeinu Hazaken Im Tziyunim, in its discussion of the omitted pesukim.

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