Cringeworthy London stereotypes who move to seaside towns

With inflated house prices, poor air quality and constant congestion, the English capital can be an unforgiving place to live... so is it any wonder many of its residents dream of a simpler life by the sea?

Migration to the UK's coastal towns is on the up, with destinations such as Margate, Brighton and Whitby among the most desirable resorts for those looking to start afresh beside the sea.

The biggest driver is almost certainly house prices. The average cost of a four-bed home in Whitby, North Yorkshire, for example, comes in at £454,991 versus £950,000 in London.

Beyond that, there's the appeal of waking up to the sound of the sea and finding a community that isn't a slave to the rat race.

And, if you choose a town such as Margate, where gentrification is very much happening – spearheaded by British artist Tracey Emin – then you'll certainly have access to some high culture including galleries, quirky boutiques and interesting restaurants. 

So, is it any wonder that more and more Londoners are ditching the big smoke and making for the coast?

Ask residents in some of the towns they're heading to about their new neighbours though... and they might suggest there are certain stereotypes that exist – arriving in a removal van full of dreams, and pinning their future happiness on a new life by the sea. 

In Kent and Sussex, the DFLs (down from Londons) is a common nickname for those who sell up and head for the regions' beach towns. 

Here's a guide to the types of excitable city dwellers who are trading in city lives for life by the beach... 

THE 'DINKS' WHO CASHED IN

Mortgage free by 40? This canny couple will be – their Camden flat, bought thanks to the Bank of Mum and Dad in their early twenties, has come up trumps. 

They are DINKS – Double Income, No Kids – with another trendy acronym close to their hearts: FIRE... Financial Independence, Retire Early.   

After a year of weekend 'reccy' trips to almost every coastal hotspot likely to be 'the next Whitstable' – and asking ChatGPT for guidance (ignoring the fact that AI suggested Grimsby as a top choice), their spreadsheet is signposting them to Ramsgate. 

What does a trendy £950,000 two-bed flat in NW1 get you in this slightly down-at-heel Kent harbour town? A totally done-up, six-bedroom sea-facing townhouse, including a one-bedroom maisonette that can be rented out – for around £750,000. 

There may only be one road that looks a bit like Camden – arty Addington Street – but 30 years from now, this will be 'the new Whitstable'. When friends whip down the M2 for the weekend? They'll meet them in Margate. 

THE MIDDLE CLASS FAMILY

A desire for more space and a 'fresh air childhood' for their growing brood has seen many a middle class parent fall under the seaside spell. 

Brighton, and in particular Hove, is veritable catnip to those locked into high mortgage payments in London's family-friendly enclaves such as Clapham, Richmond and Barnes. 

And so, they head south to double their home space for much less money, and then quickly set about trying to meet people (just like them). 

The quickest way to become a Brightonian? The local wild swimming club – there's nothing like plunging into the English Channel, wearing your Sweaty Betty bathers, to bond with a stranger. 

Meanwhile, Dad has plans to do a triathlon, and will start training just as soon as it stops raining.  

The kids, happily on the school plus ballet/rugby/theatre/swimming classes treadmill, have barely noticed the move – it's just like Clapham, basically. 

The family love the independent shops, long walks with their cockapoo (bought since moving), and interacting (before swiftly moving on) with the town's 'eccentric' artist community.  

Minor niggles? The 3am weekend effing and jeffing that can be heard and the slightly tawdry seaside party town detritus that blows around the house front on a Sunday morning – including plastic BuzzBallz containers and discarded chip trays. 

THE B&B OWNERS 

This well-travelled duo – he was a trader, so they've been lucky enough to go five-star – are well qualified to know exactly what weekenders want, right? 

Swapping out their Victorian terrace house in Fulham, which they 'sold for over a mil', they've snapped up an unloved B&B in a four-storey Edwardian mansion on the south coast and set about transforming it – leaving space for the Visit England 'B&B of the Year' award on the mantelpiece before they open.

There's white linen on the beds, products 'made with local seaweed' in the en suites and cute nods to the maritime heritage in the artwork. The rooms? £250 a night – but they include a 'local fry-up' in the morning.

For the first six months, their enthusiasm for their new life manifests in a cheery intensity that leaves most guests hurrying to close their bedroom doors shortly after arrival... and quietly dreading another dose of the life story over breakfast.

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What eventually tempers the novelty of their new life? Mascara on the white towels, the constant pilfering of products – even the mini ketchup jars at breakfast – and the biting winter wind that was nowhere to be seen when they moved in in May. 

THE RETIREES

Of all the people vacating London, the retirees deserve the coastal nirvana dream the most – they've paid their dues. 

This cultured pair, former academics with a rich and varied social life, have been saving for decades to make their dream of living in a cultural seaside idyll a reality.

They opt for a pretty village on the South Coast that has bigger places nearby – they mostly want peace, but with a little urbanity nearby.  

They dream of idle mornings looking at the ocean, coffee and books in hand. Of attending local life drawing classes to meet like-minded folk and enjoying theatre that doesn't cost an arm and a leg. 

And yet, change comes harder when you're getting on; and, three months into their move, the grey cloud – literal and metaphorical – moves in. 

The seagulls are more annoying than the pigeons, it turns out, and the Lebanese food they loved to order in London is nowhere to be seen. 

Their Freedom bus pass gave them so much more freedom in the capital too. Still, once you leave London and its ever spiralling property prices, there's no going back.  

THE HIPSTERS

Shoreditch is soooo 2017. The coolest kids in town are now in Margate, munching buns from the viral donut shop and seeing the latest free exhibition at the Turner Gallery. 

Tracey Emin is their queen and their dream rental is a pad within the Brutalist beachside tower Arlington House. 

The locals might hate this monolithic 1960s eyesore but a spruced up two-bed rental comes in at around £1,000 – or £250 each if two couples share, which is a lot cheaper than a Dalston bedsit. 

There's Dreamland right next door, too – ideal for 23-year-old 'kidults' who love roller-skating, penny slots and dodgems. 

Cliftonville, once the most dubious street in Margate, is packed with coffee houses, vintage clothing stores and vinyl record shops. East London is over, baby.