Ex-Amish Lovina Zook’s TikTok account is a fascinating peek into what is otherwise a generally closed community. When you think of the Amish, you think most likely think of no technology, music, or dancing, and strict religious practices, so someone who was once Amish making content about her old community on social media is a rarity.
The 23-year-old had always been a bit of a rebel in her community, and the breaking point for her was when her mother critiqued her church outfit, telling her she would need to cover up more or else "people are gonna start talking," she explained in an interview on CBS Sunday Morning.
Zook spent two weeks planning before making her escape. "I was like, I have to time this so they're sleeping, like, really deeply when I leave, 'cause the stairs creaked a little," she said. "And I had to, like, figure out which stairs creaked. And the day before, I sneakily oiled all the door hinges, so they don't squeak when you open and close them."
She started off her TikTok account sharing various recipes she grew up with and discussing the culture she had always known. Interestingly, her most-watched video is a simple tutorial on how she does her hair in the Amish style. It has 51.7 million views and climbing.
"No drinking; that's not allowed for anybody," she told the interviewer. "And no cursing. Absolutely not. You can't even say, 'Oh, my gosh.' That's considered a bad word."
"You can never be seen together in the daylight, and you can’t talk to your partner’s parents if you’re dating. And you can only see each other once a week."
Zook went on, "You only see each other during the night. At around 9 o’clock, the boyfriend comes to the girlfriend’s house — the door stays unlocked so you can just walk in — comes to her house, and goes up to her bed, and stays in her bed until four in the morning. And then he goes home."
You'd think that in such a conservative community, this would be the opposite of common sense for what would be considered appropriate. Zook clarified for the interviewer that while you could kiss if both parties agreed, there was no sex allowed. "You just talk and sleep, and that’s all," she said.
She added that it was important that both the boy and the girl were on the same page. "Then after the first night, the guy has to be like, 'So, you want me to come back in two weeks?"
"Or do you want me to take you home after church, or after the singing next Sunday evening?' And if you want to, you say yes. And if you don’t want to, you say no."