EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: Jacinda Ardern's Damehood determination

Former New Zealand PM Jacinda Ardern was so determined to receive her Dame of the NZ Order of Merit from Prince William that she postponed the event for a year, avoiding investitures with other royals and her Governor General. 

Jacinda, a trustee of William’s Earthshot Prize even turned down the opportunity to fly to Australia to have King Charles invest her. 

She finally got her gong from the heir at Windsor Castle last week. But she very nearly didn’t have favourite William pin the honour on her sash. 

Princess Anne was also doing investitures and an admin muddle had Arden originally on her list.

Officials are hoping that the King doesn’t fall ill at the Commonwealth summit in Samoa. 

The island nation is heavily indebted to China, which has supplied most of its major infrastructure – including its hospital. 

The risk that the royal medical records might end up in the hands of Doctor Xi Jinping in Beijing has been giving some sleepless nights.

BBC North America editor Sarah Smith dismisses Donald Trump’s allegations of Labour’s illegal interference in support of his election opponent Kamala Harris saying no money has changed hands. 

But free accommodation (provided by fellow volunteers) is surely a ‘benefit in kind’? It is a freebie, in common parlance, as Keir Starmer should know given his Lord Alli penthouse problems.

Cringing about his romcom heyday, grumpy film star Hugh Grant, pictured, reflects: ‘My mistake was that I suddenly got this massive success with Four Weddings and I thought, “Ah, well, if that’s what people love so much, I’ll be that person in real life, too”. 

I used to do interviews where I was Mr Stuttery Blinky, and people were, quite rightly, repelled by it in the end.’ 

Didn’t Stuttery Blinky make his last appearance after Hugh’s infamous encounter with LA hooker Divine Brown in 1995?

After frequent attempts to deface Eric Gill’s Prospero and Ariel statue at Broadcasting House, the BBC is taking radical action to protect them. 

After last year’s hammer attack on the work of Gill, who abused his daughters, the decision was taken to surround the sculptures from The Tempest with bullet-proof glass. With the protective screen soon to be unveiled, will the BBC incur the wrath of the anti-woke mob?

Promoting his new country album, Sir Ringo Starr admits his attempts at songwriting during Beatles days regularly met with mockery from bandmates. 

‘I had this habit of making the boys laugh when I wanted to present my songs,’ he recalls. ‘Because I didn’t know I’d rewritten well-known songs. I thought, “Wow, this is good”.