PETA Wants ‘Bad Monkey’ to ‘Kill Off the Monkey’

The group even suggests three meta ways for "Driggs" to meet his maker — including the ol' "slip on a banana peel."

PETA is so desperate to defend against the exploitation of animals that, at this point, it’s straight-up asking Apple to kill off the monkey from Apple TV+ series “Bad Monkey” starring Vince Vaughn (and a monkey).

The animal-rights group has already done all the legwork for Bill Lawrence’s writing staff, suggesting in a letter to Apple CEO Tim Cook three storyline ways for “Driggs” (real name Crystal; the monkey is female in real life) to head to the big jungle in the sky. In the letter’s words:

He could die of heart disease from eating the typical junk fed to “pet” primates.

He could die of a broken heart from being denied everything that’s natural and important to him on a set like that of “Bad Monkey.”

Or to keep it light and funny, he could slip on a banana peel!

Ah, the banana-peel slip — a classic.

The reality is the Driggs storyline (though not Driggs himself) is likely already dead — and PETA knows this.

In her letter to Cook, the author Debbie Metzler — a primatologist and the PETA Foundation’s senior director of captive wildlife — points out that the “Bad Monkey” sequel story, “Razor Girl,” does not include a monkey. Should “Bad Monkey” the TV show continue — there is no official Season 2 pickup, but we expect one — Vaughn’s detective character would likely move on to a new case, leaving Driggs (and a bunch of other Season 1 primates, including humans) behind.

“Monkeys belong with their families in the jungle, not on a noisy, crowded television set where they’re forced to perform demeaning tricks,” Metzler said in a statement to press. “PETA is calling on Tim Cook to sign the Primate Protection Pledge and get exploited monkeys out of Apple TV+’s programming.”

Metzler says that Crystal, a tufted capuchin, is owned by Hollywood animal supplier Birds & Animals Unlimited, a regular PETA nemesis. PETA says Birds & Animals Unlimited “has exploited her for over 20 years.”

A spokesperson for Apple TV+ did not immediately respond to IndieWire’s request for comment on this story. We also reached out to Birds & Animals Unlimited, but did not immediately receive a response.

Read PETA’s letter to Cook in full below; the bolding is theirs, not ours.

Dear Mr. Cook:

As a primatologist with nearly 20 years of experience, I can assure you that primates don’t want to be on TV. Period. PETA has been saying this for years. Studies have shown that using them in the media also fuels a dangerous demand for these animals as “pets.” And now, the new docuseries “Chimp Crazy” has offered the most compelling condemnation of using primates for entertainment yet. So we have a suggestion for you: If Bad Monkey is renewed for a second season, please kill off the monkey. Yes, kill off the monkey.

This should be especially easy given that the sequel story, “Razor Girl,” doesn’t include a monkey. But in case the writers need ideas so that producers won’t be tempted to continue exploiting Crystal or any other real monkeys, here are just a few suggestions for how to kill off “Driggs”:

• He could die of heart disease from eating the typical junk fed to “pet” primates.
• He could die of a broken heart from being denied everything that’s natural and important to him on a set like that of Bad Monkey.
• Or to keep it light and funny, he could slip on a banana peel!

Then, we implore you to take PETA’s Primate Protection Pledge and ban the use of primates in any future Apple TV+ productions.

We appreciate all you’ve done to lead Apple with compassion, such as the decision to ban leather, sparing countless animals tremendous suffering in a move that earned Apple PETA’s 2023 Company of the Year Award. Now, attention should turn to primates used in film and TV, and given Apple’s prominence in the entertainment industry, it’s critical that your streaming service stop supporting this cruel industry that profits off ripping baby monkeys from their mothers and forcing them into unnatural situations and lives of deprivation.

Thank you for your time and consideration. We look forward to hearing that Apple will help us lead Hollywood toward a more humane future.

All the best,

Debbie Metzler, M.S.
Primatologist and Senior Director of Captive Wildlife
PETA Foundation