Counter Profound Disappointment With Serenity and a Plan

To decompress from election shock, follow the advice of "do something” advocates.

Reviewed by Margaret Foley

Key points

• Disappointment often results in anger and numbness.
• Simple strategies can help counter disappointment and bring momentary relief and happiness.
• A seven-step serenity plan can foster relaxation and help build the right mindset for moving forward.

Social media is in overdrive with follow-up election notes and quotes. For people who feared the worst, the worst is now and may become gloomier. However, while many people are encountering numbness, stress eating, and intermittent rage, positive thinking advocates are suggesting action plans. And researchers can help us better understand the nature of disappointment.

The Toll of Disappointment

The Journal of Psychosocial Studies in 2021 reported: “To be disappointed is to be human, to be disappointing is also to be human.… The central premise [of this research] is that to engage with ‘disappointment’ in our internal relatedness, and in our interpersonal and social relationships may enable us to re-connect with our own and others’ humanity—and not to do so is to remain stuck, aggrieved, resentful and locked into cycles of reciprocal self- and other-destructive violence and recrimination."

Indeed, social media and the news have been finger-pointing and playing Monday morning quarterback. It is important to ignore negativity and seek momentary relief before following a long-term action plan.

Four Ideas for Countering Disappointment

• Face the facts by acknowledging that people who have been predicting the “worst of times” may be right.
• Stay away from television news, even your favorite cable networks, for at least a week.
• Binge-watch an old television series that was ridiculous and laughable and fun.
• Before bed each night, read a good book or make notes in a gratitude journal.

Will this bring happiness? Not necessarily. It will, however, lift your spirits, and in doing so mitigate the anger of disappointing outcomes.

A word about happiness: psychologist Iris Mauss et al., in 2011, reported: "The present findings suggest that further encouraging a mindset to maximize happiness (as some self-help books do) may be counterproductive, in that it might increase the extent to which people value happiness, making them more vulnerable to paradoxical effects."

As such, seeking serenity and taking positive action may be more helpful in mitigating the feelings of profound disappointment that may lead to depression.

A Seven-Step Serenity Plan

Can you really plan for serenity? The answer is both yes and no. What is important is a mindset and peacefulness that opens the door for a new beginning.

Serenity is the simple experience of absolute calm. To find serenity might require some changes that include:

1. Finding at least five uninterrupted minutes each day.
2. Shutting out the noise of all electronic devices and even music.
3. Making a note of at least three positive moments in your day, and express gratitude.
4. Practicing creative visualization by seeing yourself in a place that brings you joy, such as the beach or a lake, or imagining taking a walk in the woods or through a garden.
5. Appreciating heightened intuition. When you spend time “centering,” you will discover a sense of “knowing, just knowing.” Trust these intuitive leanings.
6. Motivating yourself to look beyond anger. Refuse to engage in negativity.
7. Following people on social media who have a positive outlook with beneficial, “do something” suggestions.

The Proven Value of Serenity Spaces

There is evidence that serenity spaces, such as those designed for medical personnel during the pandemic, offer benefits for well-being.

One study's findings noted: “Facilities with these spaces enjoyed staff with renewed feelings of well-being and a noted soothing of the human spirit for staff who utilized them. However, team leaders must be a part of these concepts, as establishing a space for the serenity room to occupy is only one aspect of its success. Further, managers must allow nurses to leave the floor to take advantage of these essential tools to bolster their well-being.”

By expecting goodness, it is possible to create moments of gratitude, move past negativity, and then develop an action plan to move past election shock and find meaningful community engagement.

Copyright 2024, Rita Watson, MPH