Giving Voice to Eating Disorders in Boys

John Schu draws on his own experience in his powerful book, “Louder Than Hunger.”

Reviewed by Michelle Quirk

Key points

• Because eating disorders often manifest differently in boys, they can be harder to detect.
• It is believed that a quarter to a third of those struggling with an eating disorder are male.
• Disordered eating behaviors are reportedly increasing at a faster rate in males than females.

Because eating disorders often manifest differently in boys, they can be harder to detect by parents and healthcare providers. Stigma is another issue.

It is believed that a quarter to a third of those struggling with an eating disorder are male, and disordered eating behaviors are reportedly increasing at a faster rate in males than females. It is also suggested that for boys, eating disorders may onset earlier, sometime during early and mid-adolescence, one of many nuances (Frank C, 2023, Nagata JM, et al., 2020).

Author and children’s librarian for Bookelicious, John Schu, knows firsthand the inner turmoil that comes with facing an eating disorder. His powerful book, Louder Than Hunger, is a fictionalized account of his own personal struggles in the ‘90s with anorexia nervosa, obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, and depression. He shared with Psychology Today, “Writing Louder Than Hunger helped heal my heart, inspired me to dig deeper within myself, and clarified why I care so much about connecting through story.”

How did you know that writing in free verse would bring this story to life in such a profound way?

I love novels in verse. They helped me connect with poetry again during college. I knew right away that Louder Than Hunger needed to be told in verse. I cannot imagine the story told in any other way. The white space helped me write the story. The line breaks helped Jake find his voice.

"The Voice" plays a key role in this story. Can you share a bit about the Voice, and how you've perhaps encountered it in your own life? What tools or strategies have you found to be helpful in dealing with The Voice?

Thank you for asking about the Voice. For a lot of the book, Jake capitalizes the V in Voice. In many ways, the Voice controls his life. It dictates what he can and cannot do.

It tells him he is repulsive. It tells him he doesn’t deserve to take up space. It torments him.

Once Jake realizes he is actually the Voice, and is finally at a place where he wants to follow the advice of his psychiatrist, group counselor, dietitian, and art therapist, he starts to talk back to the Voice. He starts to do the work to get to the other side.

As I write in my author’s note, recovery requires work. Every so often, the Voice wakes up. What do I do? I roar back. I reach for all the skills and strategies therapists and group therapy have taught me. I examine what’s happening in my life. I identify why I’m restricting food. I ask why I’m punishing myself. I make adjustments and remember how I never want to relapse again. I remember how much better being healthy feels.

In your book, you speak so vividly to the challenges youth face in a rapidly growing and changing body while working through identity formation in a noisy, often unforgiving world. Looking back on your own experience, what makes this time in life particularly challenging in terms of mental health?

I felt alone a lot as a kid. I felt like I was the only person who loved musicals and memorized dialogue from movies and talked to Emily Dickinson. I thought I was the only person with a brain like mine. I didn’t know other people struggled with an inner-saboteur. I questioned everything about myself. I think that’s what’s particularly challenging about that time in life.

In your book, there’s a connection drawn between the desire to be thinner and the wish to not "take up space." Can you say more about this phrase, and how it gets to the heart of eating disorders?

I didn’t feel worthy of taking up space. I thought by becoming smaller and smaller and smaller that I would eventually disappear forever. I can still see my body language during early individual and group therapy sessions—knees to chest. I sat in ways in which my body language and behaviors closed me off to those around me. I shut down. I remember wishing that I could reverse aging. I sat in ways that felt like I could perhaps turn my body back into when I was an infant or a toddler.

In your note to readers, you share, "Thanks to therapy, thanks to people who cared about me, thanks to books, thanks to lots and lots of hard work, I talked back to the voice inside my head. I learned to be loud, just like Jake." What role has reading played in your healing journey? What books were most impactful for you along the way?

Thank you for reading my author’s note.

Stories, libraries, and musicals help me work through difficult experiences as well as internal and external conflicts. I think a book often walks into our lives when we need it the most. It is one of the reasons that matching children with books is one of the most important roles we have as humans.

In no particular order, I’m grateful the following 10 books walked into my life when they did:

● Goofy’s Big Race by Disney

● The Hours by Michael Cunningham

● Flora and Ulysses: The Illuminated Adventures by Kate DiCamillo; illustrations by K.G. Campbell

● The One and Only Ivan by Katherine Applegate

● Brown Girl Dreaming by Jacqueline Woodson

● Other Words for Home by Jasmine Warga

● Love That Dog by Sharon Creech

● Out of the Dust by Karen Hesse

● The Giver by Lois Lowry

● A Single Shard by Linda Sue Park

What do you hope readers take away from spending time with Louder Than Hunger?

I hope it helps facilitate important and necessary conversations about anorexia nervosa, obsessive-compulsive disorder, depression, and anxiety. I hope it makes readers cry. I hope it inspires them to watch episodes of The Golden Girls and Family Matters. I hope it helps readers develop more compassion.