1 Factor May Separate Women Who Keep Having Sex As They Age From Those Who Don’t

There’s no set trajectory for the sex lives of women once they pass 40, according to sexologist Sofie Roos.

Some get hornier. Others notice their drive dies down. Hormonal shifts, pain during sex, and life’s many responsibilities all play a role here, the expert previously told us.

But a paper published in JAMA Internal Medicine suggests that another factor plays a bigger role in maintaining a sex life as you age than “sexual function”.

Among those in midlife or older age, the study found that the “importance” of sex matters.

What did the research find?

The researchers used data from a group of women who took part in the Do Stage Transitions Result in Detectable Effects (STRIDE) program. This is a cohort study of women who enrolled in 2005, when they were aged between 40 and 65. 

Starting in year four of the study, participants began answering questionnaires about their sexual function and how important they deemed sex. They also shared information designed to gauge their hormonal state and whether they were sexually active. 

Two-thirds (66.3%) of women were sexually active at year four. By year eight, 85.4% of that sexually active group were still going strong. 

Interestingly, the Female Sexual Function Index (FSFI) scores – which are based on answers about things like how often women feel aroused and how easily they orgasm, as well as how painful sex is and whether their body provided adequate lubrication – were quite close between the sexually active and non-sexually-active groups (22.3 and 21.8, respectively).

In contrast, women who rated sex as being important to them were about 3.2 times likelier to maintain an active sex life as they aged. 

The study reads: “This suggests that the ‘quality’ of sex does not affect whether a woman will continue to have sex over time. Midlife women have many reasons for engaging in sex that go beyond ‘quality’.”

Sex needs may change over time 

Overall, sexual function scores were quite low among this group. The study said this might be due to hormonal and bodily changes – but added that the current metrics of FSFI might not accurately reflect what actually makes women in midlife and older feel sexually satisfied.

“As women age, kissing and intimate touching become more important relative to penetrative intercourse,” it reads.

Roos previously told us that as we age, it “takes longer for the body to get ready for sex,” so building up desire slowly can be helpful.

She recommends: 

• Communicating openly with your partner about any changing needs, 
• Experimenting with toys, lube, and longer foreplay, 
• Not focusing on penetrative sex alone.

The sexologist also told us it’s important to take any pain seriously – you don’t have to endure this during sex, and professional help can be useful. 

“It really makes a difference to eat a balanced diet, do some cardio three to four times a week, drink less, give up smoking, and invest in better sleep, stress control, and your relationships,” she continued. 

Reach out for help if you are facing issues in your sex life. It is not, after all, as simple as “just getting older”. 

As the paper said: “As we study and care for these women, a more nuanced understanding of female sexuality is essential.”

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