Recognizing, Working With, and Healing Emotional Triggers

Exercises for healing emotional pain, including the hurt inner child.

Reviewed by Margaret Foley

Key points

• We may not recognize immediately that our reaction to a situation was caused by a trigger.
• Triggers may be activated by family, friends, co-workers, the news, and other situations.
• Talking to pain in the body may be useful for healing the pain underlying emotional triggers.

Trauma and emotional triggers can be sneaky. One minute we are rolling along, humming a happy tune, and the next minute the bubble bursts. Just when we thought we were more or less emotionally healed, another trigger rears its not-so-pretty head. Bam!

We don’t always recognize that we have been triggered until later, when the feelings have subsided a bit. However, an intense emotional reaction to a situation (more than would usually be warranted for that situation) may at times be an indicator of an emotional or trauma trigger, including adverse childhood experiences (ACEs). Triggers may be activated by relatives, friends, co-workers, news stories, current events, and many other situations.

Emotional or trauma triggers, though, can also be viewed as a window into what needs to be emotionally healed. Traveling into the trigger (with the help of a competent counselor or psychotherapist) can be a journey, but it’s also part of the healing path.

Somatic and Gestalt-Type Exercises for Emotional Healing

There are exercises that you can do—alone or with your psychotherapist—that may assist in healing the issue underlying the trigger. Some psychotherapists, including Gestalt-oriented therapists, utilize these types of somatic and experiential techniques. However, you can also explore part of this work yourself.

Emotional Pain Held in the Body

One way to work on healing triggers is to feel into the pain or discomfort stored in the body. (Of course, there may also be a physical reason for pain, which may require a visit to a medical healing professional.) However, when traumas are not dealt with and released, they can often be stored in the body and disguise themselves as physical pain in particular zones of the body. These areas may include the head, stomach, back, neck, hips, and other body parts.

1. Talking to the Pain Stored in the Body

On the surface, talking to the physical pain may sound kind of wacky or strange. However, the pain held in your body may reveal issues and traumas that are needing to be healed and released.

If conducting this healing exercise alone: Go into a quiet room where you won’t be disturbed. Turn off your phone and, if you live with someone, you may need to hang a “Do Not Disturb” sign on your door.

Many people find that journaling (free-form writing) assists with the emotional healing process. If you use journaling for healing, get out your journal and a pen. Sit quietly and comfortably, taking several long, deep breaths. Have a box of tissues handy and close your eyes. Ask that sore neck, hurting stomach, or other body part what it needs to tell you.

Listen to the hurt inner child: Be patient and don’t force it; your hurt inner child may need to know that this is a safe time and place to reveal itself. This process may take time. What part of your hurt inner child needs a voice and is calling for help and healing? If it helps, write down in your journal what the pain (the hurt inner child) reveals to you. Get your tissues and feel through it.

2. Rocking and Soothing Your Inner Child

After the trauma has revealed itself to you, you may want to move on to another exercise in emotional work: Healing, rocking, and soothing the hurt inner child. This exercise may be especially useful to do with your counselor or psychotherapist, but you can also do it by yourself.

Hold your arms in a position as if you were holding a vulnerable baby. Close your eyes. In your mind’s eye, picture your hurt inner child lying safely in your arms. Feel the feelings. Now gently and securely rock that young vulnerable version of you. Tell your hurt inner child (and mean it) that she/he is safe with you now and that you will always take care of and protect her/him. (Be sure to follow through with your promise.) After you’ve gently rocked and soothed your inner child, thank him or her from the bottom of your heart for being willing to be vulnerable enough to share this pain with you.

Continue the Healing With Your Counselor

As always, discuss this healing work with your counselor or psychotherapist. These exercises may open up a portal to more that needs to be explored and healed. Therapists may have various approaches to healing the inner child, including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy techniques.

These are just two healing exercises that may assist you in your emotional healing journey. Your psychotherapist will likely suggest more emotional healing exercises. If you wish to dive deeper into this process, you may find that group therapy or another emotionally safe healing group may assist in this path. Make use of supportive and safe healing professionals and loved ones.

Remember: Your willingness to explore and heal your pain and trauma means you are braver than most people. You have an inner reserve of strength that will help you on your healing journey. Don’t give up! You can do this, and you are NOT alone.

To find a therapist, please visit the Psychology Today Therapy Directory.