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Seth Meyers Bastes Trump for His Rambling Turkey Pardon
The president spent so much time talking that Meyers thinks the turkeys would have preferred to be put out of their misery.
by https://www.nytimes.com/by/trish-bendix · NY TimesWelcome to Late Night Roundup, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
‘A Vivid Imagination’
President Trump wandered far off topic during the pre-Thanksgiving turkey-pardoning ritual at the White House on Tuesday, talking about gas prices, Hunter Biden, drug dealers who’d “poured into our country like we were stupid people” and a governor he considers a “big, fat slob.”
“I think those turkeys were standing there being, like, ‘Just [expletive] kill us. Put us out of our misery,’” Seth Meyers said on Wednesday.
“Now, most presidents at the turkey pardon keep it light. They make a few bad puns, they wish everyone a ‘Happy Thanksgiving’ and they go back to work. But that’s not Donald Trump.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“In that same press conference, he said there’ve been no murders in Washington D.C. in the last six months because of him. There’ve been 62 murders in Washington, which already indicates a vivid imagination. But does he really look at himself in the mirror and go, ‘I am thin’?” — JIMMY KIMMEL, referring to Trump’s remarks about the Illinois governor’s weight
“Again, this was supposed to be a turkey-pardoning ceremony.” — SETH MEYERS
The Punchiest Punchlines (Gobble-Gobble Edition)
“This morning, on the freshly paved-over Rose Garden, our commander in chief presided over an important American tradition — the annual pardon of the turkeys. Which, at this point, are the only thing Trump hasn’t pardoned this year.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“President Trump participated in the National Thanksgiving Turkey Presentation at the White House and pardoned both turkeys, Gobble and Waddle. And then, like everyone else he pardons, they were both rearrested on weapons charges.” — SETH MEYERS
“That’s right, President Trump participated in the annual Thanksgiving turkey pardoning, passing out pardons to Gobble, Waddle and Ghislaine.” — SETH MEYERS
“Their names are Gobble and Waddle, which is what Trump does every night at dinner.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
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