Ranking All The "Secret Lives Of Mormon Wives" Cast's Dirty Soda Orders

The Dirty Soda Deep Dive No One Asked For

Dirty sodas are my new favorite OBSESSION. And honestly, I had to see what all the hype was about. After getting obsessed with The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, their Swig orders drew me in! I decided to try them all and rank them, because someone has to. Some are surprisingly good, and others…well, let’s just say they sure are something. And honestly? Their dirty soda orders reveal where they’d rank as people, too. I guess taste really does correlate with personality.

Here’s my official deep dive into lime, coconut cream, and pure chaos.

5. Demi - Sparkling Water With Sugar-Free Coconut, Sugar-Free Pineapple & Coconut Cream

4. Whitney - Sparkling Water With Sugar-Free Vanilla, Sugar-Free Peach, Sugar-Free Pineapple, & Raspberry Purée

3. Maci and Mikayla - Diet Coke With Lime & Coconut

2. Miranda and Layla - Sparkling Water With Strawberry Purée, Sugar-Free Vanilla, & Coconut Cream

1. Jessi, Jen, & Taylor - Dr Pepper With Coconut Cream & Vanilla

I think I've become OBSESSED with dirty sodas

So, after all this taste-testing, I’ve come to the conclusion that these MomTok ladies put their ENTIRE personalities into their drinks. Some of these combinations made zero sense but somehow worked perfectly, and others don't need to make a comeback.

But overall, dirty sodas are actually so delicious and weirdly refreshing, and I totally understand the hype and have officially become OBSESSED. My official ranking stands, Dr Pepper supremacy forever.