Wedding ring

To Love and Cherish Till Death Do Us Part: A promise under pressure in modern age, by Oluchi Igboma

by · The Eagle Online

Standing before families, friends and witnesses, couples often exchange vows that have echoed through generations. “To love and to cherish,Till death do us apart.” These words are meant to symbolise lifelong commitment, unwavering devotion, and a partnership that endures through life’s joys and challenges. Yet in today’s rapidly changing world, this promise appears to be facing unprecedented pressure.

Across many societies, marriage is no longer viewed with the same permanence it once enjoyed. Rising divorce rates, changing social values, economic hardship, social media influence, and shifting expectations have all contributed to redefining how people, the young generation, view love and commitment. As a result, many are asking whether the traditional and religious marriage vow still hold the same meaning in the modern age.

During the previous generation, marriages often lasted for 45 years and above, but in this generation, it is hard to find a marriage of five years without it being on the verge of collapsing. Marriages were often considered a lifelong institution and journey filled with love, growth, patience, and understanding. 

Couples back then were expecting to weather storms together regardless of the difficulties they encountered. Divorce cases were rare then. Not only because of religious and cultural beliefs, but also because communities and churches encouraged couples to remain together.

However, in today’s context, the landscape has changed significantly. These new generations are built on expectations that extend beyond survival and companionship, with the mentality of leaving a marriage over any slight misunderstanding and provocation. Many people seek emotional fulfillment, personal growth, financial stability, and mutual support from their partners. While these expectations may not be fully realisable, they can place enormous pressure on marriages when reality falls short.

Economic challenges have become one of the major tests facing modern marriages. In our society, rising living costs, unemployment, and financial uncertainty often creates stress within households, couples who once envisioned a comfortable future together may find themselves struggling to meet basic needs. Financial strain can lead to frustration, misunderstandings, and conflict, gradually weakening the bond between partners.

The digital age has also transformed the way people experience relationships. Social media platforms constantly expose individuals to carefully curated images of seemingly perfect marriages and lifestyles. Comparison can create dissatisfaction and unrealistic expectations. In some cases, online interactions have become sources of temptation, mistrust, and infidelity further challenging marital stability.

Also Read:

At the same time, societal attitudes towards marriage have evolved. 

Unlike the previous generation, many people today are less willing to remain in unhealthy or abusive relationships and marriages. 

This shift reflects growing awareness of personal well being and individual rights. Some view the increase in separation as evidence that commitment is weakening.

Others argue that it represents a refusal to endure harmful situations simply because of upholding tradition and religious beliefs.

With all these said, from an interview consulted, Mrs. Joyce Obianke from St. Paul’s Anglican Church said “The issue may not be the vow itself, but how people prepare for marriage. Love alone is not enough to build and sustain a lifelong union. Successful marriages require communication, patience, sacrifice, trust, understanding, and a willingness to forgive and to grow together. Many couples jump into marriage only focusing on the wedding ceremony without having the knowledge that after the wedding comes marriage. Couples should have realities and expectations of building a truthful, faithful, and shared life.”

Contributing, Mrs. John Egbegbulem, the wife of the Reverend of St. Paul’s Anglican Church, commented: “Marriage is not only about sweet things. Some days, it is also bitter. Couples should know what marriage is all about before taking the vows.” She also said marriage in this modern age is undoubtedly different from what it was decades ago. 

Egbegbulem added: “The pressures are greater, the distractions more numerous, and the expectations more complex. Yet the essence of the vows remain unchanged. To love and to cherish someone until death parts you is not merely a romantic declaration, It is a daily choice that requires effort, understanding, and residence. Despite these challenges, countless couples continue to honour their vows everyday. Their stories rarely make headlines. Yet they serve as reminders that lasting commitment remains possible. They navigate financial difficulties, raise families, overcome disagreement, and support each other through illness, loss, and uncertainty. Their bond demonstrates that the promise can still thrive when both partners are dedicated to nurturing it.”

In an era where relationships, marriages can sometimes seem disposable, perhaps the enduring value of the vow lies not in its simplicity but in its challenge. To love and to cherish till death do us apart remains one of the most profound promises two people can make and one of the most difficult to keep.

. Igboma is a 200 level student of the Department of Journalism and Media Studies at Delta State University, Abraka.

Follow The Eagle Online Channel on WhatsApp

[wpadcenter_ad id='745970' align='none']