A Woman Shared These 6 Quiet Realities Of ADHD That Rarely Get Mentioned, And Commenters Feel SO Seen

by · BuzzFeed

Posted 2 minutes ago

Like so many things related to health, ADHD is severely underdiagnosed in women. Why? Well, most likely because it presents differently in girls.

Elizaveta Starkova / Getty Images

According to Nature, boys and men with ADHD show signs of hyperactivity and impulsivity, whereas girls and women are more likely to be hyperverbal, aka chatty, as well as "internally restless." (Though, to be clear, they can also display hyperactive symptoms.)

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Unfortunately, ADHD has become nearly synonymous with hyperactivity to everyday people, so other signs can easily be missed. Which is why I found it so interesting when I stumbled across a Thread by Sofia Rose, who shared a list of ADHD symptoms that have nothing to do with a person's ability to focus.

Note: All points in Sofia's list have been fact-checked by BuzzFeed's staff. 

Here's what she pointed out:

sofia.roseonline
/ Via threads.com

First, Sofia described ADHD task paralysis, writing, "1. The shame of knowing exactly what you need to do and being unable to make your body do it, every single day, for your entire life, with no reliable explanation that doesn't sound like an excuse."

sofia.roseonline
/ Via threads.com

"2. The grief of watching time pass while paralyzed — not choosing to waste it, not enjoying the rest, just stuck in a gap between intention and action with nowhere to go," she continued.

sofia.roseonline
/ Via threads.com

Then, Sofia went on to describe the unfortunately common experience of ADHD symptoms being misinterpreted as character flaws. "3. The exhaustion of relationships that require you to explain yourself constantly to people who experience your symptoms as character flaws directed at them personally."

sofia.roseonline
/ Via threads.com

She also touched on how these factors can affect someone financially, writing, "4. The financial cost — late fees, impulsive purchases, forgotten subscriptions, missed opportunities, jobs lost to inconsistency — that accumulates quietly over years into a gap between where you are and where you could be."

sofia.roseonline
/ Via threads.com

On the personal side, Sofia concluded with, "5. The chronic low-grade sense that everyone else finds life easier than you do, combined with the inability to prove it because you've become too good at hiding the effort."

sofia.roseonline
/ Via threads.com

And finally, "6. The specific loneliness of a condition that is invisible, frequently dismissed, and consistently misrepresented — so that even asking for support requires first convincing the other person the problem is real."

sofia.roseonline
/ Via threads.com

In response to the thread, people are commenting that they've "never felt so seen."

jociemeldrum / Via threads.com

"5 and 6 are the hardest to deal with especially when the neurotypical people closest to you respond with 'I struggle with that too you just have to get over it,'" one person said. "How many times do I have to remind them that our 👏OUR 👏BRAINS 👏ARE 👏NOT 👏THE 👏SAME!"

maybemanders / Via threads.com

There were a lot of thank yous.

peytondavisprospere / Via threads.com

What are your thoughts? Let us know in the comments.

  • Alexa Lisitza

    BuzzFeed Staff

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