The Real Housewives of Potomac Recap: Love After Lockup

The Real Housewives of Potomac
Sofia Home!
Season 11 Episode 2
Editor’s Rating ★★★★
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Last week’s premiere concluded with the revelation that Tia’s husband, Rob, had admitted to maintaining a profile on dating apps for more than a year, insisting that nothing physical happened and that he just “felt lonely in the marriage.” Question for the audience: Is it worse to discover that your husband has been actively cheating on you for a year or that he’s spent 12 months unsuccessfully soliciting strangers on the internet? If the best-case scenario is that you had such poor game that you couldn’t actually close the deal with anyone, I’d argue that you are too far gone to try to come up with reasonable justifications for your indiscretions. Especially since the rub of it all is that he was anything but discreet: Not only did he spend a year advertising himself to prospective romantic partners, but he apparently couldn’t even be bothered to care enough to prevent his wife from finding out through her castmates. And to add insult to injury, Tia had to ask him to take the profile down herself. On a show where the bar for marital fidelity has long been in hell, Rob showed up with a shovel in tow to find even deeper depths sink to.

Tia’s struggle with making sense of her father’s history of infidelity has made Rob’s decision-making here feel especially cruel. We just spent a season watching Tia try to make amends for the siblings she rejected due to feeling betrayed by her dad, only to end up duplicating the life of her mother and repeatedly making excuses about her husband’s selfishness to try to keep the family unit together. With her mother coming to stay for the summer, I’m sure we will continue to see Tia process the painful betrayal of being cheated on by a man with a combover worse than Donald Trump. 

But if there’s anything this group of women knows well, it’s how to bounce back from humiliating infidelity, and all of the women gracefully rise to the occasion and offer Tia sound advice. Gizelle urges Tia to slow down and not feel rushed to make any singular decision. Wendy reminds Tia that Rob is the one who violated the marriage, and should be responsible for carrying the burden of explaining his actions to their daughters himself. While it’s sensible advice, the subtext is thick with the reality of Wendy’s admittedly strained relationship with Eddie. At every chance, the former professor is throwing around signs brighter than an air traffic controller that she blames Eddie for the predicament they are in as she tries to convince the audience that everyone is gleefully reveling in her downfall. 

Robyn notices this during their one-on-one sit-down, and doesn’t shy away from acknowledging the obvious tension. I’m still trying to figure out exactly how Robyn is going to fit into this cast now, but her willingness to admit to Wendy that she found Ashley and Gizelle gossiping about Tia’s marriage in poor taste is a positive indicator that she won’t just be functioning as Gizelle’s mouthpiece all season. She offers Wendy a clean slate and agrees to try to be more respectful of how they discuss Wendy’s legal affairs on the podcast. 

Wendy is in a bit of a tricky position, where she is suffering under the pedestal she built for herself. She has spent years constructing an image of marital and professional achievement, and now that both pillars of that identity are under extraordinary strain, she is asking for empathy that I am doubtful she would offer in return. Her attempts at breadcrumbing financial ignorance aren’t really going over that well after spending seasons insisting she was smarter than all of the other women; Eddie has never really been clear on what he makes for money; and most damningly, Wendy has always presented her marriage as the ideal duo out of the cast. She cannot be surprised that people are not running to comfort her in her low moment, even if it has to hurt; but taking it on the chin and persevering the way Porsha had to rebuild her reputation on camera would go a lot further for her than insisting she is being uniquely victimized. There is a difference between being unfairly abandoned by one’s community and facing professional consequences amid serious allegations of fraud. Wendy is entitled to defend herself, but the narrative that she has been persecuted merely for existing is doing her few favors. 

As long as Wendy’s main source of refuge is her mother, Susan, though, I doubt that will change anytime soon. It’s touching to see their bond remain intact during what Wendy describes as the darkest period of her life, but Wendy’s insistence that the entire world has turned its back on her and was waiting for her downfall is becoming increasingly difficult to indulge. The mother-daughter duo finds time to take a (clearly pre-planned) swipe at Karen, with Susan advising her daughter to “go to the library and find another reference.” It’s a cute line, if rehearsed, but the reality is that Karen’s advice, while pointed for entertainment purposes, is correct. The best thing Wendy can do is refuse to talk about the case while everything plays out. If Erika Jayne can remain mum while people are calling her responsible for stealing from grieving families, so can Wendy. The more she talks, the more room she has to let people poke holes in her choices and lifestyle, and no one is more ready to step up to the plate than Gizelle.

Gizelle meets up with Tia with two clear objectives: to smooth over their fight and to call Wendy a scammer on camera. Gizelle might be mainly focused on reputational repair, but I generally believe Gizelle when she says she feels bad for Tia (even if Kal had to walk her through why she was in the wrong). That empathy, however, has a very firm expiration date when the conversation turns to Wendy — and while I am generally inclined to dismiss Gizelle’s moral pronouncements, I actually understand her position here. If Gizelle were the one facing criminal charges, Wendy would not merely throw her under the bus; she would climb into the driver’s seat and reverse over her for good measure. When Tia asks whether Gizelle has personally experienced that kind of treatment from Wendy, Gizelle responds with characteristic bluntness: “I’m not a scammer. I’m not a criminal. I haven’t given that to give.” 

At long last, we arrive at Karen’s party, who has decided to celebrate her return home with a Color Purple-themed gathering at a medical spa in Bowie, Maryland. The premise is baffling on several levels, but to be frank, the event is too confusing to be offensive. The women arrive in varying shades of lavender, looking like a bridal party that has been inexplicably redirected to a dermatology appointment. Karen arrives in full Sofia drag, which is a sentence I could never have imagined writing in this lifetime or the next.

Alice Walker’s novel is one about gendered violence and racism with explicit queer undertones, but I imagine Karen hasn’t cracked the book open since it first came to theaters in 1985. I cannot sufficiently explain the absurdity of watching a woman commemorate her release from incarceration by subjecting herself to voluntary pain in a medical spa. The festivities include massages, liquid IV treatments, and what appears to be an extensive menu of cosmetic procedures. At one point, Karen prepares for laser hair removal of her bits and kibbles, prompting the obvious question: Who is the Grand Dame getting ready to fuck? 

The Grand Dame’s bizarre event cannot entirely distract from the unresolved tensions among the women, however. Karen begins discussing her experiences with incarcerated women, positioning herself as someone who has gained a newfound understanding of the system’s failures and the people caught within it. Wendy jumps at the opening to nail Karen to the wall about how she feels abandoned by Karen, who chose to punish her last season after Wendy jumped on Stacy’s bandwagon. Karen is no one’s saint — her having the cast eat dinner less than 10 feet from where she had her bootyhole hairs singed off is clear evidence of that — but Wendy needs to learn that at times, the most effective response to a perceived slight is simply to let it pass. She gets in a zinger challenging Karen’s rehab narrative, but her reflexive defensiveness makes it increasingly difficult for Wendy to engage with any discussion of accountability that doesn’t begin and end with her own grievances, and ultimately works against her, whether or not she has a valid point about Karen’s hypocrisy. If Wendy refuses to see that for herself, she will simply have to learn it the hard way. 

Next week, Cynthia Bailey makes a guest appearance, and Gizelle discovers that Tia has been relaying details of their discussions to Wendy. This, predictably, does not go over well: the woman who has made a career out of spreading information is now very concerned about the sanctity of confidentiality. See you then!

Cherry Blossoms

• I am happy that Thiemo is making an effort to support Stacy’s career on-camera. Unfortunately, Thiemo has all of the charisma of a piece of cardboard. It is likely just a function of German excitement, which tends to register somewhere between mild bemusement and polite acknowledgment. I wish them both the best, but I cannot pretend to be invested in the house-training of a pet while Stacey kisses their dog on the mouth. 

• Wendy’s confessional look with the curlicue hairstyle? I don’t know if doubling down on glam is the smart play here, but she is really looking fantastic; I will not lie. 

• Courtney freely admitting she and her husband were both cheating on each other and decided it was cheaper to stay married? Move over Will and Jada Pinkett, we have a new bad marriage for life and I am very intrigued. 

• Gizelle claiming that Jamal Bryant cheated privately is one of those lies that you just kind of have to let her say. I’m fairly certain it was gossip in the Baltimore and megachurch community for years, but whatever helps her feel more superior, I guess. 

• Nothing notable about Robyn’s return just yet, but I am looking forward to her and Karen sparring again. (Although I did find her freely admitting to GLP-1s interesting). 

• Tia claims to attempt to broker peace between Gizelle and Wendy, but her revealing that she called Wendy a scammer felt like her being more eager for a moment than looking out for a friend. This is not the first time Tia has done something slippery like this; I have definitely got my eye on her. 

• I remain fascinated by the fact that Rob apparently spent time on dating apps 17 years ago. The landscape of online dating back then was completely different and for real horndogs: I’m talking OKCupid/Craigslist days. That is a man who makes cheating a lifestyle.