5 Holiday Gratitude Tips for Overwhelmed New Moms
Discover how gratitude can ease postpartum depression this holiday season.
by Kelly Siebold · Psychology TodayReviewed by Abigail Fagan
Key points
- The holidays can feel harder for moms navigating anxiety, depression, and overwhelm.
- New moms can use gratitude to reduce postpartum depression and holiday stress.
- Simple, actionable ways to practice gratitude include reframing hard moments and curbing perfectionism.
It’s the holiday season and what we often call “the most wonderful time of the year.” But happiness isn’t what everyone experiences, as the next few months can bring a lot of stress, guilt, and pressure. For new moms struggling with postpartum depression and anxiety, this season can feel exceptionally hard. Sleepless nights, mental exhaustion, and the endless demands of caring for a baby don’t take a break just because it’s a festive time of year.
If you’re a mom who is struggling with sadness, overwhelm, or anxiety, it’s easy to feel guilty and ashamed as well, because society tells us this time “should” be happy. When what you’re told to feel—or believe what you should feel—doesn’t match what you’re experiencing, it can add a heavy emotional weight that feels impossible to overcome.
Even in the tough moments, finding little things to be grateful for can help you feel more grounded and bring a sense of healing. Gratitude doesn’t mean forcing yourself to feel happy or pretending everything is perfect—it’s about acknowledging the good, however small, and allowing those moments to shift your perspective.
Why Gratitude Matters for Your Mental Health as a New Mom
Practicing gratitude isn’t just a nice idea; research shows it has profound effects on mental health. Gratitude has been linked to significant psychological benefits, including enhanced mood, increased self-confidence, and a greater sense of resilience.
For example, a 2022 study found that gratitude can help women struggling with depression become more accepting of their circumstances, leading to decreased feelings of anxiety and increased overall well-being. The study highlighted how practicing gratitude fosters self-compassion and reduces mental strain, making it a valuable tool for women experiencing postpartum challenges (Fronters in Psychology, 2022).
Gratitude also improves our ability to cope with stress. By focusing on what we’re thankful for, we can foster an outlook that’s more solution-oriented and less reactive, which is especially critical for new moms juggling the physical and emotional toll of early motherhood. Additionally, research shows that gratitude promotes happiness, strengthens relationships, and enhances physical health, including improved sleep and reduced chronic pain (Harvard Health, 2024).
How to Find Gratitude During the Holidays as a New Mom
1. Start Small and Be Specific
Gratitude doesn’t have to be grandiose. Begin with one small thing that brings you comfort. Maybe it’s getting to drink your coffee while it’s still hot, a quick call with a friend, or a few minutes of alone time while your baby naps. The key is to focus on the present moment—what feels good right now?
Action Tip: Before bed, write down one thing that brought you joy or relief that day. It could be as simple as getting through a difficult moment or enjoying your baby’s laughter.
2. Reframe the Hard Moments
It’s okay to feel overwhelmed, tired, or even resentful during this time. Gratitude doesn’t erase those emotions but can coexist with them. For example, if you’re frustrated by the endless mess after a holiday meal, you might also feel grateful for the loved ones who created those moments of connection.
Action Tip: When a tough moment arises, pause and ask yourself, “What’s one small thing I can appreciate about this situation?”
3. Incorporate Gratitude Into Your Day
Make gratitude a regular part of your routine. During a holiday meal, share one thing you’re thankful for with your partner or child. Or, as you prepare for the day, silently acknowledge the support you have, even if it’s just the strength you’re finding within yourself.
Action Tip: Try a three-week gratitude challenge: Each day, list three things you’re thankful for. Over time, it will become easier to notice the good in your daily life.
4. Let Go of Perfection
The holidays often come with expectations of perfect meals, happy motherhood memories, cheerful gatherings, and picture-perfect moments. If you’re not feeling up to it, give yourself permission to simplify. Gratitude grows more naturally when you’re not weighed down by unrealistic standards.
Action Tip: Shift your focus from “doing it all” to prioritizing what truly matters to you and your family this season.
5. Seek Moments of Connection
Gratitude often flourishes in relationships. Expressing thankfulness to your partner, a friend, or even a helpful stranger can strengthen bonds and create a ripple effect of positivity. Research found that practicing gratitude not only helps with individual mental health but also fosters stronger connections with others. The practice builds a feedback loop of positivity and trust, reinforcing those bonds over time (Psychology Today, 2024).
Action Tip: Write a quick note or send a text to someone you appreciate, letting them know how much they mean to you. It’s a simple gesture that can brighten both your day and theirs.
Your Gratitude Journey Starts Today, Mom
If you’re feeling the weight of postpartum depression this holiday season, remember that you’re not alone. Gratitude doesn’t mean dismissing your struggles—it’s about finding small moments of light to guide you through the darker days. By focusing on what’s good, no matter how small, you can gently reframe your perspective and create space for healing and connection.
This holiday season, give yourself grace. Whether it’s a warm sip of tea, a moment of quiet, or the support of someone who cares, there’s always something to be grateful for, even in the toughest moments. And sometimes, simply making it through the day is reason enough to give thanks.
References
Harvard Health Publishing. (2024). Giving thanks can make you happier. Harvard Medical School. Retrieved from https://www.health.harvard.edu/healthbeat/giving-thanks-can-make-you-happier
Psychology Today. (2024). 7 scientifically proven benefits of gratitude. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/201504/7-scientifically-proven-benefits-of-gratitude
Tomczyk, J., Nezlek, J. B., & Krejtz, I. (2022). Gratitude can help women at-risk for depression accept their depressive symptoms, which leads to improved mental health. Frontiers in Psychology, 13, 878819. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2022.878819. Retrieved from https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9022718/