What it truly means to be courageous

WE, as a society, celebrate those who are courageous because we see them standing tall and doing big things that many of us lack the confidence to do.

We are appreciative that there are those in our community who embody courage in our place, and we wish we were more so ourselves.

We catch ourselves saying things like, “How I wish I had that courage,” or “I wonder what I could accomplish if I were them.”

I think we can all agree that courage is a value that is widely admired and recognised as having great social worth.

I cannot remember when I first came across the concept of courage, but the ones that come to me are those that were shown in the cartoons I would watch on the television.

The most memorable example to bring up on this topic is ‘The Lion King’, a childhood classic Disney picture.

When I saw this film as a kid, I believed that Simba’s journey was truly an insight in courage.

After losing his father as a careless cub, Simba is next in line to the throne. However, he chooses to run away from the Pride Lands after being manipulated to believe that his father’s death was his own fault.

Fearing the potential societal condemnation, Simba lacked the courage to face the consequences of his actions.

By the end of the movie, Simba returns home and regains his title of ‘King’ after finding courage to fight the antagonist and to publicly acknowledge his shame.

I never thought of myself as a courageous person, at least not according to the concept that led me to define courage in a particular way.

I was always reserved and timid as a child. I always tried to go by the rules and avoid conflict of any type in order to live a pretty ‘normal’ life. I never thought that many of these traits fit the description of what makes someone ‘courageous’.

I used to think that in order to be courageous, one had to do big and revolutionary things, much as how Simba defeated his uncle who was responsible for his father’s death and went on to become king. I believed that the true meaning of courage could only be attributed to exceptional characters or individuals.

When I do feel courageous, though, it is usually not for pulling off something incredibly ‘heroic’ as in the cartoons or movies.

It is just me having the confidence to start a conversation when feeling shy.

It is me walking in an office to start a new page in life.

It is me stepping outside of my comfort zone to pursue the things that I want to do without caring what other people think of me.

Yet, doing all these feels really powerful.

I came to the realisation that I am courageous even if it does not always manifest itself in heroic actions. Really, what made an effect was my ability to find the confidence to follow through and take action because I knew I could trust my choice, and myself.

People often glorify courage, especially in ‘spectacular’ deeds that usually become viral on social media or are written in biographies.

Undoubtedly, courage does not always have to be grand – it can also be found in quiet moments, like a single parent trying to support the family, a teenager battling anxiety, or a young adult fleeing a toxic relationship.

I think it is also important to emphasise that courage is not the same as ‘not being afraid’. Of course you may feel afraid, but that does not mean you cannot find the courage to act.

According to the Greek philosopher Aristotle, courage is ‘not the lack of fear, but its mastery’. A courageous person, in his opinion, only fears the ‘right’ things (things worthy of fear), and is able to recognise one’s own fear and knows how to face them.

He believed that it was important to consider ‘why’ one faces one’s fears as much as ‘what’ one fears, highlighting the significance of a person’s motivations for getting through those hard times.

When a person chooses to act out of fear because they are driven by passion or a desired result, they are showing courage. They come to understand how to face and overcome the discomfort instead of simply avoiding it, even when doubt whispers in their ears and their legs tremble.

To reiterate, courage is found in all sizes, forms and circumstances.

Sometimes courage is as simple as opening your eyes the next morning after having the toughest time at work the day before.

Sometimes courage is the way you start trusting a person again after experiencing heartbreak or betrayal.

Sometimes courage is saying ‘no’ to people or things that you have no desire to do.

Sometimes courage is taking responsibility for your actions and admitting your mistakes.

Sometimes courage is apologising when you think it is necessary.

Sometimes courage is showing love and kindness to yourself, even when you think you are undeserving of it.

The wonderful thing about all of this is that courage manifests itself in our life in a variety of distinctive ways, and they are all equally meaningful.

Take this time to acknowledge both the big and small acts of courage in your life, and honour how they made you feel.

* The writer is a psychology graduate who enjoys sharing about how the human mind views the world. For feedback, email to priscarinast@theborneopost.com.