The UNGA meetings has united NYC streets into a full gridlock

WHAT I know: The UN? The Tower of Babble.

Politicians? This is the land of promise — especially before Election Day.

Crapdammy is cutting down on city crime. He’s taking our cops off the streets.

A CNN poll states that 35% of people are sick and tired of news about Bruce Blakeman and that includes Bruce Blakeman.

Elon: “Drive carefully. It’s not only the car that can be recalled by its maker.”

Politics. Obtaining funds from the rich, votes from the poor on the pretext of protecting each from another.

This politician’s guest of honor is remarkable. Bright — yes. Educated — yes. Friendly — yes. Working Democrat — no.

Communism won’t work because Lenin was a strict follower of Marx. Not Karl — Groucho.

Biden — cheap? No, no, no, no. Just that instead of having a party he likes to go out and paint the town beige.

With what’s going on in the world today maybe Amelia Earhart and Judge Crater knew something.

It’ll be a big-time Family March to DC for election time. Three million kids in cars throwing up and screaming, “We there yet?”

Young Dem female: “I’ll do anything for a mink coat.” She did. She got it. Now she can’t button it.

Car executives worry their new model has a tendency to roll over on its back. So where’s the problem? Didn’t hurt Madonna.

With the UN in town so many foreign cars here that it’ll be two years before anybody’s hit above the knees.

Our world is so integrated that the Russians invent something, the Japanese copy it and over the weekend sell it to us cheaper.

Medical profession? An Eastern charity just collected $3 million — and they don’t even have a disease yet.

Prices so high that one envoy asked for 50 cents worth of Swiss cheese and the store wrapped up eight holes.

Ambassador: A person who helps you get what’s coming to him.

Ambassador: “Because I kissed you, what makes you think you could neglect your work around here?” Secretary: “My lawyer.”

This European guy just opened a restaurant — but it only has two tables. Owner: “I get nervous if nobody’s waiting.”

“The luckiest guy was Adam. Why? He had no mother-in-law.”

Ambassador, do you talk to your wife when you’re making love? Answer: “If she calls, yes.”

Short? When she wore a miniskirt the hem got dirty.

His town’s so small that the other day the tide went out — and never came back.

Our new little mayor? Caught reading the yellow pages to see if anything’s left to tax.

Such a bad cold that the ambassador’s nose ran more than a tourist in Mexico.

Woman to a diplomat: “So what did you do with all that money we gave you last year?”

Crooked? Please. He has to screw his hat on.

Only way to get around in city traffic when the UN is in session is to follow a demonstration.

Definition of a statesman? A pol who didn’t get caught.

So take a look at your taxes and then stop calling them cheap politicians.