The Challenge of Holiday and Social Eating

Excess holiday or social eating can leave people with regrets.

Reviewed by Abigail Fagan

Key points

• Eating events during the holidays or at other times can be a challenge.
• There are many influences on our food choices in social situations.
• Discovering personal values around health goals can be effective.

Much has been written about how to stay calm and enjoy the celebrations that come with the holidays at year’s end. There’s a lot of advice out there, some more useful than others.

In the land of health and fitness, there are many interventions on offer to avoid holiday weight gain and the regret that may follow. There are challenges, contests, boot camps, and other ways to incentivize people to hold the line during the holidays. There may be prizes at the end of the season if there hasn’t been any weight gain.

These are external reward systems that may or may not work, even in the short term. Research tells us again and again that short-term reward systems are not effective for any sustainable change in behavior. At the end of the day (or season), has anything changed to make the next event easier to deal with?

Influencers of Social Eating

There is an opportunity here to take a closer look at the ins and outs of social eating and apply a few principles that can be useful all year when it comes to social eating situations.

What goes in to how we choose to eat when we are in social situations?

• Family history
• Genetics
• Ability to control impulses
• Culture
• Advertising
• Traditions
• Approach to decision-making
• Values
• Knowledge of nutrition
• Existing body weight
• Age
• Presence of anxiety or depression
• Stress level

This is just a sampling. As usual, anything that involves human behavior and the choices we make is incredibly complex!

Social Eating Mindsets

Let’s break it down a bit more in an effort to simplify the situation, and then come up with some useful strategies. The goal is to come through holidays and other social events feeling OK about how we did with our eating.

Social eating is in our DNA. Science tells us that early humans would gather around the fire, share information, swap stories, trade skills, and share the bounty. It was a way to develop community, become informed, and benefit from what others had to offer. It was also a great way to keep themselves alive and thriving as a species.

Research tells us that even though the game has changed a lot, we are still a species that picks up information and even food preferences from others. We learn what is acceptable, and appropriate for certain circumstances. That information is influenced by childhood memories, religious practices, personal ethics, family structure and traditions, cultural traditions, and now the media.

Other research tells us that there are personality traits that can influence social eating. There are “people pleasers” who may have trouble saying “no” or figuring out what is “required” of the situation. Others genuinely have difficulty controlling their eating impulses. Some studies have indicated that extroverts can be more apt to seek novelty in their lives and in their food choices. Some people have difficulty zoning in to their hunger signals (or lack of them).

Advice and Strategies

Given the complexity of the situation, it seems almost ridiculous to try to give pat, one-dimensional phrases of advice. And yet some advice can be useful.

That would include:

• Don’t go to an event super hungry. Have a healthy snack beforehand so that you don’t start eating everything in sight when you get there.
• Have a plan. You may be pretty much aware of what to expect. If that is the case, visualize yourself making certain choices and leaving the rest.
• Eat mindfully. Pay attention to how full you are, what foods you really need in order to feel sated, and stop when you feel full. This involves eating slowly.
• Do not feel like you have to eat how other people are eating. Stay focused on your own consumption.
• Concentrate on socializing, not eating. This may take some advance planning and visualizing as well.

These strategies and words of advice may work for some.

Beneath the Advice and Strategies

The question is: What mindset comes before using those strategies? Can strategies work as stand-alone behaviors, or can there be a deeper approach that is more likely to be effective?

A deeper approach can be a combination of soul-searching and connecting to principles of healthy nutrition.

The first thing is about WHY a person would choose to moderate food intake when presented with a feast, a buffet, or a rollicking event accompanied by alcohol, chips, and high-fat finger foods. Research tells us again and again that making decisions based on a personal WHY connected to what each person values about themselves is something that can be a deep motivator. Additionally, the WHY can be a driving force when it comes to being able to weigh the potential consequences of each choice.

The second is more pragmatic and comes after determining the WHY. It is to build a knowledge base of nutrition basics so that the choices made are based on health goals and factual information.

Once applied, a person can learn to pause, be mindful, develop a plan, and make considered decisions that may not be perfect but will make for a better immediate experience. With practice, a combination of mindset and strategies is something that can be carried forward for future holidays and events.