Next Gen NYC Season-Premiere Recap: Hoedown Throwdown

Next Gen NYC
Serving Country
Season 2 Episode 1
Editor’s Rating ★★★
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It’s time for sophomore year — at least for the Bravo nepo babies of Next Gen NYC. After the network successfully pulled together a motley crew of Real Housewives offspring and their Manhattan socialite friends last year, the gang is back for a second season in the city. But make no mistake, this show about them navigating New York is very different from the literal In the City — by about 15 years. Yes, Bravo (primarily through its editing choices) makes it very clear that this is a young, hip show. Sometimes those editing swings make sense, like incorporating more social-media posts and group chats, but other times the stylistic choices simply perplex. Like why does Bravo think making the captions all different sizes screams Gen Z? We may never know.

But one question they can answer for us is what this cast has been up to since the last time we saw them. In fact, the most promising sign of this cast’s reality-TV bona fides is just how much happened with them while cameras were down. The biggest news, of course, is the breakup between Ariana and Hudson, though some of their castmates think that the aptly timed announcement could just be fodder for a story line this season. In any case, Ariana’s moving out to Brooklyn but at least scored a brand deal out of the move. If there’s one thing Bravolebrities know how to do, it’s maximize their brand-deal payouts in the midst of personal tragedy. Oh, and speaking of tragic, she also decided to scrap her plans for a fashion line (which Ava derided last year) after realizing that she, in fact, doesn’t have good style. 

But she’s not the only one moving. Gia is vacating her mom’s house in Jersey for her own place in Jersey. Before she leaves, she hopes to steal some of Teresa’s spices in a scene that I desperately hoped would result in her mother once again trying to pronounce the word cumin on-camera. But alas. And speaking of Teresa, Ava says she unfollowed her, but I think she’s got bigger issues to worry about now that she’s been evicted from her apartment after her father (Damon Dash) was late on paying her rent. Don’t you hate it when that happens? Meanwhile, Riley is off traveling the world, Georgia went into an inpatient program for eating-disorder recovery, and Charlie was famously at the scene of the crime at the crypto torture house in Soho. Oh, and Brooks got really into making bread. Production must have heard about that last one and said, “Oh, we have to get cameras up now!”

Amid all this catching up, we also meet one of the two new additions to the cast (Brooke Shields’s daughter hasn’t yet emerged): Liam Obergfoll. We’re introduced to Liam (whose last name I keep confusing with the Obergefell v. Hodges Supreme Court case … happy Pride!) through Brooks, who retains his title as the Grand Dame of Next Gen, when the pair play ice hockey together, of all things. It’s a great way for him to mention that he auditioned to play Ilya on Heated Rivalry, which makes me wonder if there’s some horrifically cursed Sliding Doors alternative universe where Connor Storrie is on Bravo. But he’s not just an actor (or auditioner); he lists off a whole litany of descriptors, though most are hobbies — actor, writer, director, ski instructor, volunteer firefighter, equestrian, motorcyclist, surfer, hockey player. Not since Sonja Morgan have we seen a multi-hyphenate runneth over in such a way.

The big event of the episode that finally brings our cast together is Emira’s country-themed birthday party (though it would have been “cunt-ry” had the Bravo censors not intervened), which everybody prepares for at one of two dueling pregames. Shai, the cast’s emotional-support puppy, is donning a full horse costume as he pregames with new BFFs Hudson and Charlie (the latter of whom half-heartedly promises not to make a move on Ariana). Meanwhile, Brooks is dressed like Woody from Toy Story and comes alive like I’ve never seen him before when he starts doing a country accent. “My voice kind of sounds less irritating in a Southern accent,” he says, and while I love the classic Marks monotone, he ultimately is right. Speaking of Brooks, Ava might have the quote of the episode when she says (unprompted), “I was watching Boss Baby last night and it kind of reminds me of Brooks, because Brooks is the cutest, sweetheart, angel baby but then he, like, runs a business.” No notes.

The party itself gets off to a strong start, with Georgia saying, “I don’t know how long I’m gonna stay. I was literally fighting for my life on the toilet last night,” as she approaches, citing bad salami. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: She is the best part of this show by miles. To make matters worse for poor Georgia, she’s the first person there and is forced to make small talk with Emira’s parents, which is particularly awkward given that the two of them are still beefing. 

But once the other guests finally arrive, Georgia wastes no time making good television. “Do we take Hudson out of the group chat?” she asks within seconds of greeting Ariana before admitting that she initially thought the breakup was just for the cameras. Good move, Georgia, you can’t be accused of talking shit behind someone’s back if you do it right to their face before they get the chance to confront you. Plus, once she saw that Ariana was moving, she figured the breakup was legit. No matter how much attention you crave for your reality show, nothing is ever worth moving in New York City. 

Though she gets that conversation out of the way early, Georgia can’t return home to her toilet just yet. Emira pulls her aside to once again rehash their feud over her throwaway Ozempic comment last season. You’ll recall that on their cast trip last year Emira ordered Red Robin (of all things) for herself ahead of their dinner because she was starving, so Georgia remarked that her Ozempic must be wearing off. It’s truly one of the most benign comments that I’ve ever seen dragged out into a story line on all of Bravo (up there with Pantygate), and Georgia yet again apologizes right away. It’s actually such a nothingburger (pun intended) that Georgia suspects that that’s not even what she’s upset about. It turns out that Emira had been accusing Georgia of being overly flirtatious with her boyfriend, so perhaps that’s what this is really about. 

But wait! How would Georgia have even caught wind of that? Well, she tells us it was through the gay grapevine, which she beautifully describes as such: “The gay grapevine is my network of queer people both domestically and internationally who are my eyes and ears and tell me things. I did not hear about it in this country. I heard about it from someone who does not live in this country. It’s a lifelong commitment to establish a gay grapevine. The gay grapevine operates, like, above the CIA in terms of functionality. When you’re in, you’re in … forever. I do not reveal my sources within the gay grapevine, ever.” These are their stories … dun-dun. In any case, Emira denies that she’s pissed about that, and both grievances eventually get put to bed. As does Georgia.

Meanwhile, Gia greets Charlie, and being the reality-TV pro she is, she tries to bring up his involvement with the crypto torture house, but he doesn’t bite. “My freedom isn’t worth an edit,” he says in his confessional — which suggests he’s guilty of something. All we knew was that he happened to be there, and now here he is talking about the possibility of getting locked up if he says too much? Suspect. 

And as if that exchange weren’t awkward enough, Ariana and Hudson are interacting for the first time since their split, and it’s agonizingly brutal. He makes some weird joke about having to refrain from grabbing her ass and then spends the rest of the night waiting for her like he works at the place. Plus, Ariana naturally doesn’t like that he’s hanging out with Charlie, and Georgia wisely points out that Charlie’s probably just cozying up to him because he knows he has money. And Hudson’s so butthurt over Ariana talking to Liam that he probably won’t even notice if Charlie racks up a tab on his card. 

At the after-party, Ava confronts Gia for saying that she lied about Teresa unfollowing her on Instagram. Nonetheless, Gia maintains that her mother did no such thing, but why would she know that? Teresa seems like someone who’d just be pressing buttons left and right in any case, so I tend to believe Ava. That being said, I also don’t think Teresa is keeping up with the ins and outs of this show, nor is she adjusting her Instagram depending on how the feuds play out on any given week. But the funniest part of this whole conversation comes when Gia says that family is off limits. Gia Giudice. How soon we forget! The very reason she’s on this show today is that family was very much on limits. We watched the Giudice-versus-Gorga war play out for years, so much so that interfamily drama was the central premise of the series. So for Gia to suddenly say that family is a no-go is completely comical — especially when her mother appeared on this very episode. If it were up to me, I’d just let Ava deal with Teresa directly, and her inevitable funeral could be the series finale.